5 questions I asked to get balance in my life a personal experience.
What’s important to me?
When you ask this question then you may get the answer my son, my family, my partner or my friends first. Or the answer could also be career it is not a sin for that to be the case. It is important to be honest in the order and priority.
I say I always have to have 5 things to have balance and the order of importance, my 1. Husband, 2. Kids, (I could wrap that into one as family), but we are still our own entities and need things like date nights. 3. Career 4. Yoga (Me) 5. Learn (Doctorate)
What do I want to be important?
I ask this question because the answer to what’s important might not be the same. I remember as a management consultant shortly into an assignment, being in my business apartment on a Sunday typing away on my laptop preparing for a workshop in the US. At that moment I wished I had someone to share my life with, and my life was not just about my laptop and career. What I truly wanted I didn’t have. However, I had reached a point of truth, and verbalised. Little did I realise then be careful what you wish for.
What do I need to do differently to get a chance of having what I really want?
Break the cycle.
I loathed the people that judged me because I was working all the time because it was not that easy to meet the right man. At the time I was in Switzerland flying in and flying out the entire time still acting as a consultant. I had taken an independent assignment, so I decided after the business trip to make a conscious effort to not fly back to London, but to integrate into Switzerland. Think about what could change your circumstances. It may be you want to achieve something else, but changing your routine, or putting boundaries in place can bring about change.
I went from flying back to practicing and teaching Yoga with my Swiss colleagues and now friends, captaining a Netball team, going out to different groups entrepreneurs, and social where I met so many new and like minded people. As a consultant networking is normal, but we are never in one place really long enough. 2 months into my assignment I went to an event alone, could not find the group and asked a man where it was. We talked the whole night and never looked up until we realised the whole bar was empty. That man is now my husband and father to my 2 children,
I continually ask this question. After having kids I have been clear to set my boundaries. I get in early, but I am leave on time to pick up my kids. I am not about being present but being effective.
What’s the most important thing in life? Answer ME
This may sound like an arrogant answer, but it is true. If you do not have your health you can’t be there for your partner, children, do your job or whatever else is important to you. It is so easy to go back into a cycle that disturbs the balance, but before you do, ask yourself that question. Continue on a positive cycle that brings what you define as balance.
What is it going to take?
What support, people and things do I need to put in place or change to take ownership of my life? It may be that some of the old people and things that you have go, because they don’t fit into their way you want to balance your life. Be brave enough to stop. I decided to stay in Switzerland even though I was only on an assignment. This was risky because I had to learn German to stay and work here in industry, get a permit to stay by getting a permanent job, give up my place and things in the UK.
I am a girl that asked these five questions. I came to Switzerland with 2 suitcases and 5.5 years later I have what I define as balance. A lot has changed and most of all my mind set.